Mention Costco to any ex-pat or snowbird and they do the same thing – roll their eyes and nod sympathetically.

Costco is a necessary evil to us all. It is needed because of either the products or the prices (if you like to buy in bulk). Shopping there is usually a good experience but the checkout is another world. The lineups, for whatever reason, are loooong, and no-one seems to understand why but accept it as punishment for going there.

We went today, to buy a case of wine. But the first mistake we made should have told us that it was going to be an ordeal. That mistake was getting a bus to “Centro” without asking the driver if he went to the ‘Plaza Caracol’. There are a few bus routes into downtown and one has to study the stops on the bus windshield before getting on or else you will be taking a ‘mystery tour’. The bus we picked, after rejecting at least three for being standing room only, said ‘Centro’. Usually most centro buses take the same route – the direct route. But there is one route that goes through the barrios and takes at least an hour longer. We picked that one this morning – ‘the mystery tour’.

Realising our mistake we got off and decided to walk the rest of the way. Forty minutes later we arrived at Costco. Found the wine, and a couple of other items and then stood in line and stood in line and then stood some more.

The procedure after checkout is to get transportation and for those without their own car that means Uber or a taxi. But first you have to obtain a taxi and that is by submitting to the pleadings of a ‘taxi tout’ these unpaid folk chase around the lot and nearby road trying to get a taxi for you. When they succeed they help the driver load the trunk and then look at you with “Look what I have done for  – give me a tip!” look. Some unsuspecting newcomers try to brush them off with the “I just loaded my own groceries what do you want a tip for”; wrong. Give them 20 pesos and everybody is happy.

Back with what we wanted – enough wine to last a couple of months we were back home.